Life and Loss

Happy and sad hold hands.

Happy and Sad Hold Hands

A couple of years back, I was struck by sorrow and celebrations's presence in the same time space, same breath even. How grieving and happiness could co-exist was baffling to me. I resisted it, felt that experiencing one in the other's presence was somehow disrespectful and took something away from the other. Yet, time and time again, it was so. They shared space.

As I began to accept that this was indeed how things went and how things could go, I saw it more and more. I also saw how the cohabitation of differing emotions and what seemed to be extreme experiences was actually a kindness, a necessary kindness, maybe more obviously in the face of sorrow, but even so, a kindness. One helps the other not to get stuck, to keep moving forward, moving through, and the other helps keep the right pace, not too rushed, enough of a slowing to enable presence and alignment of priorities.

I dubbed this co-existence with a phrase that has stayed with me, "happy and sad hold hands." These words gently remind me that it is okay for both to be together, not just side by side, but intrinsically and intentionally linked to help me through life's journey.

Words Without Pictures

I left at exactly the right time to arrive at my destination. I turned up the road and immediately noticed a car to my right on the shoulder, hazards slowing time. My eyes scanned the surrounding area, wondering where the occupants were and then I saw. In the median between this way and that way, time most certainly stood still. A young child, maybe three or four, was holding tight to a woman's hand. The woman, crouched down, the child too, looking at a memorial of flowers and a cross, faded and winter-worn.

And then they rose and crossed back over the road to the waiting car.

My mind was digging deep, remembering the news of a car crash in this very spot, one that left a toddler fatherless, about a year and a half ago. It fit, too easily and not at all at the same time.

As I drove on I realized I had turned down the wrong road. This wrong turn gave me a front row seat to this very sad scene that played out before my eyes. For some reason I was meant to see this. And I know. I know why.

I prayed for that young child as I carried on in time to my destination.

"God, please watch over this young one. Tenderly care for and love this little heart."

Happy and Sad Hold Hands

Early this morning a dear lady, a woman of grace and beauty, a child of God, went to be with her Heavenly Father, our great Creator, Maker of heaven and earth.

There is such a profound sense of loss at the same time as a profound sense of joy, knowing she is now face to face with Jesus. I've said it before in a very simple way that seems incapable of holding my thoughts on this...happy and sad hold hands. It is so.

God gives and takes away. Blessed be the Name of the Lord.

Spotlight - Love in Loss

The past couple of years have included highly challenging and deeply painful times. These times of loss and suffering have allowed me to see Grace and Love in ways I likely would not have had the pain and loss been absent.

This past October I was at the lake with some friends for a weekend away. Walking along the beach, ravaged by a freak weather bomb, a heart, calm and quiet, lay peeking out from the sand. It seemed as though it was just waiting for me to see it. The destruction was still all around me but in the midst of this, quiet and calm were present.

Love in Loss